Too many "Earls" in Madison County?

You don’t know me. Hopefully in time you will. But before you sigh and say, “Oh no, another Northern transplant,” understand that I am here by choice and plan to make Madison County my home for a very long time. My columns are not written because I want to change things. On the contrary, I hope that you will see Madison through the eyes of someone who is thoroughly enjoying a new experience and has the good sense to laugh at herself!

•••

My name is Earl?

Upon arriving in Madison County, I was just a woman from New Jersey with very little knowledge of anything south of the Mason-Dixon Line. Of course I had sampled biscuits and gravy and was definitely a fan, although my waistline wasn’t. The local produce was very tasty but I was still partial to a Jersey tomato.

While pondering what to do with the 15 pairs of stilettos in my closet that I foolishly thought I needed, I began to meet my neighbors. That’s when I realized that names up north were definitely different than those down south.

What’s in a name? If you live in Madison County, plenty goes into your first and last name. Within a few weeks I learned that there were names that were synonymous with the history of the county. There were so many Shotwells, Clores, Knightings, Weavers, and Yowells, that I wondered how much advanced math was needed to calculate how many “removed cousins” each might be from the other.

Certainly there were old family names in New Jersey, but the influx of newcomers to the community was swifter and the purity of names much cloudier. First names in Virginia were also much more interesting.

There was loveliness about a woman’s name that was biblical in origin. Or perhaps it was just the way each name was pronounced.

As for the male persuasion, there was definitely a marked difference.

Nothing, in New Jersey could have prepared me for the numbers of “Earl’s.” Up until we arrived in Virginia, my only recollection of someone named Earl was a cute boy in my elementary school. He had the oddest name in a classroom filled with Tony’s, Jimmy’s, and Billy’s.

These were the days before people searched to find a name which would surely cause their child great angst in adulthood. Earl was pretty special and became more so when the record “Duke of Earl” was released. Oh yes, the only other reference to Earl was when my little Italian immigrant grandmother mispronounced the word “oil” as “earl”.

So now I’m in Madison County and there are more Earl’s than I could imagine. You see, Earl’s come in many shapes and sizes, too. There are old Earl’s, young Earl’s, fat and skinny Earl’s, Earl’s with facial hair and Earl’s with e’s at the end of their “Earle.” One could say that all Earl’s come with pick up trucks, but then again, most Tom’s, Dick’s and Harry’s also have a pickup!

What I love about the Earl’s is the chance to roll the “r” off of my tongue and make the name sound so rich. Earl gives you the chance to just slowly slide into a soft Virginia accent. I continue to practice saying Earl so that within a few months, no one will ask me if I guest starred on “The Sopranos.”

So, if you see a woman wondering down the road muttering Earl, Earl, Earl, realize that she is savoring her new life south of the Mason-Dixon Line.

(Guest columnist Valerie Goossens is a newcomer to Madison County, having arrived in August 2008. She has lived most of her life in the metropolitan New York City-New Jersey area, except for 13 years she spent living in Asia. She and her husband, Alfred Goossens, now reside in Syria, where they are building a home near Rag Mountain Estates. Contact her via e-mail at three.geese@vabb.com.)